{"product_id":"the-ignoring-you-shorts","title":"The Ignoring You Shorts","description":"There is a special kind of joy in leaving your phone on the kitchen counter, locking the front door, and disappearing for two hours while your inbox catches fire without you. You do not owe anyone instant access to your nervous system just because they sent a message marked urgent at three in the afternoon. When the noise gets too loud, the healthiest move you can make is to stop explaining yourself, step outside, and put physical distance between your brain and whatever artificial crisis someone else created.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThe Ignoring You Shorts are an essential piece of The Quiet Quit Collection, built specifically for those hours when you are actively refusing to be reachable. Whether you are logging miles, jumping in a pool, lifting heavy things, or just aggressively walking away from your responsibilities, these shorts handle the transition without any hassle.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nWe cut them from a lightweight, four-way stretch microfiber blend made of recycled polyester and spandex, giving you total freedom to move while wicking away sweat and drying fast. With a clean 6.3-inch inseam, UPF 50+ sun protection, and an unlined interior, they feel ridiculously airy and never bunch up or drag you down. An elastic waistband with a flat white drawstring keeps everything locked in place, while deep mesh side pockets hold your keys and essentials without weighing you down. Pull them on, leave your notifications on silent, and enjoy the quiet.\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"size-guide-title\"\u003eSize guide\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"imperial\"\u003e\u003ctable cellpadding=\"5\"\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWAIST (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHIPS (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e38 ⅝\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33 ⅛\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e40 ⅛\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e36 ¼\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e43 ¼\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e39 ⅜\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e46 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e42 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e49 ⅝\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e45 ⅝\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e52 ¾\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Flip'em the Bird ","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":68044501221558,"sku":"1163055_9812","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":68044501254326,"sku":"1163055_9813","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":68044501287094,"sku":"1163055_9814","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":68044501319862,"sku":"1163055_9815","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":68044501352630,"sku":"1163055_9816","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":68044501385398,"sku":"1163055_9817","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0015\/8295\/6605\/files\/all-over-print-unisex-athletic-long-shorts-white-front-6af50fa5e410f.jpg?v=1794445239","url":"https:\/\/flipemthebird.com\/products\/the-ignoring-you-shorts","provider":"Flip'em the Bird ","version":"1.0","type":"link"}