{"product_id":"the-happily-single-shorts","title":"The Happily Single Shorts","description":"There is a specific, unmatched euphoria that hits the first weekend you realize nobody is mad at you for taking a nap. You do not have to negotiate what to eat for dinner with someone who vetoes four options and offers zero solutions. You do not have to sit through another awkward family barbecue with someone who pouts in the corner like an overgrown toddler. Your space is entirely yours, your schedule is empty, and the only emotional climate in the house is the one you personally decide to create. Being on your own is not a waiting room for the next compromise. It is an upgrade.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThe Happily Single Shorts belong to The Ex-File Collection, designed specifically for roaming your kingdom in absolute peace. We cut them from a featherweight, four-and-a-half-ounce recycled mesh that breathes the second you move, because sweaty, stiff activewear belongs in the trash along with your ex's toothbrush. The two-way stretch fabric pulls heat and moisture straight away from your skin, so whether you are actually sweating through a run, pacing around the kitchen cooking an absurd amount of pasta, or sprawling out across the entire mattress because nobody is there to steal the duvet, you stay completely cool.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nWe gave them a clean regular cut that gives your legs room to move without billowing out into an old-school basketball tent, backed by a soft elastic waistband that stays put without digging into your ribs. The fabric carries UPF 50+ sun protection for the days you actually leave the house to get some fresh air, and it is certified clean under global recycled standards so you can enjoy your freedom with zero extra guilt. Pull them on, leave your ringer off, and enjoy the pure, uninterrupted luxury of having nobody to answer to.\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"size-guide-title\"\u003eSize guide\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"imperial\"\u003e\u003ctable cellpadding=\"5\"\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWAIST (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHIPS (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e38 ⅝\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33 ⅛\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e40 ⅛\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e36 ¼\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e43 ¼\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e39 ⅜\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e46 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e42 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e49 ⅝\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e45 ⅝\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e52 ¾\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Flip'em the Bird ","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":68032956629174,"sku":"5456191_9812","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":68032956661942,"sku":"5456191_9813","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":68032956694710,"sku":"5456191_9814","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":68032956727478,"sku":"5456191_9815","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":68032956760246,"sku":"5456191_9816","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":68032956793014,"sku":"5456191_9817","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0015\/8295\/6605\/files\/all-over-print-unisex-athletic-long-shorts-white-front-6af37f83dfcac.jpg?v=1794342808","url":"https:\/\/flipemthebird.com\/products\/the-happily-single-shorts","provider":"Flip'em the Bird ","version":"1.0","type":"link"}