{"product_id":"the-disassociated-joggers","title":"The Disassociated Joggers","description":"\u003cp\u003eThere is an elite, quietly unhinged skill you develop after a decade in the workforce: the ability to sit upright in an all-hands meeting, nod with precise professional interest, and not process a single syllable being said. Your physical vessel is technically logged into the company network, but your spirit left the premises thirty minutes ago. It is walking around a grocery store on a Tuesday afternoon, taking a nap in a patch of sunlight, or mentally calculating how long your savings account could survive if you simply closed your laptop and never reopened it again. Dissociation is not an attention deficit. It is a vital defense mechanism your brain deploys to keep your soul from flatlining between two slide decks.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Disassociated Joggers belong to The Quiet Quit Collection, built specifically for the hours when you need to pull your consciousness entirely offline. We took dense, pre-shrunk fleece that balances breathable cotton with durable poly, giving you that thick, structured weight that immediately lowers your heart rate. The brushed interior feels absurdly soft against your skin, acting like a warm buffer between your nervous system and the unhinged expectations of your employer. They refuse to pill into a rough mess, meaning they can handle countless spin cycles while you wash out the lingering residue of a terrible work week.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWe cut the rise intentionally, dropping it lower in the front so it sits comfortably beneath your ribs and extending it in the back so the waistband never slips when you curl your knees up to your chest on the couch. The tapered legs finish with snug ribbed cuffs that stay anchored right at your ankles, while the thick external drawcord and charcoal-trimmed pockets give you plenty of room to completely bury your hands. They have enough structural integrity to run miles if you actually want to put on running shoes, but their true calling is keeping you thoroughly insulated while you stare at your ceiling and give the company absolutely nothing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"size-guide-title\"\u003eSize guide\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"imperial\"\u003e\n\u003ctable cellpadding=\"5\"\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWAIST WIDTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eINSEAM LENGTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e22\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e38\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Flip'em the Bird ","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":68043371511990,"sku":"4890569_9927","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":68043371544758,"sku":"4890569_9928","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":68043371577526,"sku":"4890569_9929","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":68043371610294,"sku":"4890569_9930","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":68043371643062,"sku":"4890569_9931","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ S","offer_id":68043371675830,"sku":"4890569_9909","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ M","offer_id":68043371708598,"sku":"4890569_9910","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ L","offer_id":68043371741366,"sku":"4890569_9911","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ XL","offer_id":68043371774134,"sku":"4890569_9912","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Athletic Heather \/ 2XL","offer_id":68043371806902,"sku":"4890569_9913","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0015\/8295\/6605\/files\/unisex-joggers-black-front-6af4c92682227.jpg?v=1794427185","url":"https:\/\/flipemthebird.com\/products\/the-disassociated-joggers","provider":"Flip'em the Bird ","version":"1.0","type":"link"}